I took off towards the kitchen, taking the way least populated by strangers and opportunity for another one of “those” conversations. I was in a daze of sorts when I caught the stare of Jake. He was watching me move across the room, his gaze followed me as I went, I followed his eyes with mine. I sudden heap of self-consciousness jumped on top of me. I felt anxiety take over my face and took on the most awkward demeanor possible. What was it that made him so inviting, I mean, I was so drawn. Was he this appealing to every girl I wondered to myself? Probably so, he certainly had me intrigued. He gave me an alluring stare from across the room, and then he turned and started to walk to the front of the house…and I followed.
Wait, what was I doing? Why was I following him? Oh this is bold I thought to myself, this was definitely the new Stefanie, the old Stefanie would have rather crawled into a hole than put herself out there like this. I just wanted more, and I had a feeling he had just that. We entered the front of this house, my steps close behind his, and then he suddenly turned and looked at me as if he just noticed I was just behind him.
“I’m sorry, I…” I was starting to say. Oh geez, did I misread him, did he not intend to look so inviting? I knew it, oh great, what was I going to say. Maybe he was looking past me; I turned to look behind me, as the awkward demeanor took over my body once more. There was no one behind me, I turned to face him.
Before I could get another word out, his mouth was wide open against mine. He kissed me hard, hardest I had been kissed in a long time. It was intoxicating. He held the back of my head; his fingers tangled in my long brown hair, and pressed my face harder against his. I rose to my tip toes as he slowly slid his hand down my back pulling my lower body close into his, slowly making his way down further while holding my body tight against his, the kiss consumed me and I fell into him, letting go of all the anxiety.
“Oh whoa sorry ya’ll, just looking for you Stef…um come find me when you’re um, finished….” Blair said as she steadily made her way back out of the room, grinning from ear to ear. Jake’s hands were still pulling me to him, I returned my gaze to his, he was totally unphased by the interruption. I could feel his breath on my mouth, it seemed like we stood there frozen forever. I broke away and stepped back, trying to maintain my balance, still fixated on the grip he had on my body.
What was this all about? Whatever it was I was into it, and realized that I was ready. I was ready to be on my own, ready to start living, living for me. It was invigorating and the thought filled my mind and body with excitement.
“I better find Blair” I said, barely able to speak, trying to catch my breath. I turned away from him and slowly walked back towards the kitchen, a smile spread across my face. This was going to be fun. I found B making me and Will another drink. I had completely forgotten about the drinks. I joined her, hip to hip, and she looked at me and smiled.
“So Stef, I see you are doing just fine!” she said half laughing, also with slight satisfaction, as she knew this was exactly what I needed. Vodka and a house full of cute boys, one of which I found myself to be rather fond of. It was what I needed…for right now anyway.
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